less is more

You know, about a year ago, I was this same person. Very emotional and wearing everything on my sleeve. Most of that as a result of being told that I should be more openly emotional and not bottle things inside. As a result, I did start to become even more open with my feelings leading to sentence number three.

Well, over that time -- although I was told that it would be otherwise -- it turned out to be what I thought it would be; in the end, it was almost impossible to deal with someone of my emotional intensity. It was like dealing with Dark Phoenix. Oh well: they told me they would let me know when they couldn't deal with it. They did let it be known.... to someone other than me. I mean, we could go into it all day, but in the end, it ended up with a systematic flat-lining of the broader range of my emotions minusing simple focused anger.

During the time of that flat-line, many things dark emerged. One of these things things being Erik whom I've mentioned. Not that it matters right now...

Then there is the matter of words. My last week has been one of misunderstandings. Many of them. In spite of the fact that I have IM conversation logs, this blog, texts in archive, emails in archive. Still, I am misunderstood and -- get this -- by people who, for the most part, say that I say too much or that I'm too complex.

Enter the ten words diet. I'm a master of communication. When I use words, whether many or few, they are all said for a reason. I take a lot of time to explain myself because I want to be understood, but it seems that most people just want to be answered and don't care to understand me very well at all aside from that information. As a result, ten words. There's more to it than that, but that's the core. The asides are conversations I've had with so many different people now, all of them leading me to believe I should just shut the fuck up...

...and maybe I should.

I can say everything I want in twenty words. Fifteen words. Even one.

But I have settled on ten. Don't believe it? Try me.