a pause for emotion...

MR is graduating from his basic training from the Navy. Everything is wonderful this morning. I imagine that the sky is clear and that snow is all around. The wind brings a chilly crispness to everything around you.

He wakes up and he places his uniform on. He wonders who will be there to see him graduate and he imagines seeing the ones he loves as the fog of sleep starts to clear. His dad, brother and girlfriend are all up there getting ready if they haven't already gone. They have waited for this moment for a long time and it was every bit of joy for them to be able to see him.

I imagine how happy he will be when his division is called and he graduates and it is all over for just a moment. He hugs everyone that he hasn't been able to see for weeks on end. Every moment had to be like an eternity without these people and now that torment is over for just a moment...

... unfortunately one person will be missing from that picture. He'll be missing for reasons beyond his control and that is well-known. He wants to be there but he can't... I can't. I wish with all of me that I could be, but a plane won't fly because I want to see my friend today. Cars won't run on my wishes. Not today. Instead, he will be there and I will be here.

These kinds of things, I become emotional about. I'm pretty sure I'll be out of it for a little while. I have things to do and they will get done, but my heart is heavy right now. I'm holding his letter right now and trying not to cry.

I love you, MR.