I want to get a new phone. I don't need my phone to be this big. It has a qwerty keyboard. I got the phone for that reason specifically, yes, but I wanted it to be smaller. Smaller. Just less. Like a lot of other things. I just want there to be less of a lot of things. One of them is this phone. I want a smaller phone with a qwerty keyboard that just slides out, let's me type, then I can go back to having a bar phone. Something like an Envy2. That would be nice.
I like James. I like using names when I am talking about people on my journal. I like James a lot. He's cool. He's emotional at times and I understand being emotional like that, but I don't understand why he's emotional sometimes and when he's emotional he doesn't want to talk about why, so I'm stuck I guess, but I still like him. He gets me. He doesn't always think I'm unreasonable. We talk. We game. We love our cats. We're clean together. It's a good relationship and I'm glad I invested in that one. It was an all-around good idea. I know he'll leave one day. He has to in order to pursue his dreams and best of luck when that happens. I'm glad I have him now, though.
Sex is starting to interest me more now. I want to know how it feels to do something like that and that is growing. I wonder where it will end up.
I wish certain friends were online more. We do crazy things together and it becomes an inside thing. I miss those inside things. We're all so busy. I'm so busy. I have a lot less free time than I let on and that means things go undone. Constantly undone. I have too much I want to do and even more I need to do. I started a new blog on social trends and other things, started learning how to draw manga characters (currently working on faces), and I'm reading more (working on two books at once. Taking a break on one). I'm also working out every day (I take a day off when my body asks for other things like sleep), trying to sleep more (notice previous parenthetical comment), and other things.
Speaking of exercise, I'm starting to like my body. I like exercise. I like having biceps. I want abs, but I guess that will come in time. I want it soooo bad, but I have to keep things in balance aka can't work myself to death trying to get abs I just have to let them come as I continue to develop my whole body. I've also noticed other things I'm noticing. Things like my posture. I look a lot more buff when my posture is correct and a lot less when it's not. I'm loving the way I look -- at least, a little more -- now. Definitely more as I continue exercising and training with the punching drills and the bag and all of that other stuff.
I miss my training buddy. I missed one training session and he got so mad and then he moved and I haven't heard as much from him since then. I really miss training with him and I miss him in general. I paid his phone bill today. He doesn't know that. He doesn't know I have a phone I'm going to give him, either. He doesn't know a lot of things I have going in the background. I don't care. I'm going to give it to him anyway and he'll resist, but I don't care about that, either. I just think this is how things are done among friends. He needs something and I have it to give and I will give because giving is what I do.
I do a lot of things. I wonder about some of those things. I probably shouldn't do them. They might have a negative impact that I can't reverse if I continue. Some of them I do knowing that very thing. I guess that makes me human. So do other things I think like, "I want to go home."
I think I'm going to get that phone now.
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