About Brevity

This trip -- and most things I experience -- have taught me about loving.

This week has been one of deep appreciation and warning. I was doing high school, then college, then stabilizing my financial life, then finding a home and maintaining it and work and just growing up and just like that 14 years went by.

My uncle was happy to see me and after we talked about why I had my iPhone in hand at all times -- which took me a minute to explain and I wish he would have asked last night -- we talked about the next visit.

He said it is important that I come back and visit more often because I have ties here and it is my home. It would be rough going if I came up and wished I had been here to see my grandparents again.

He's right. Love is such a beautiful thing but our time to share it -- to burn our brightest light to those we love -- is brief at best and there is never a guarantee that I will have that person or people to love again if I don't give it all I have right now.

This is why I'm big on going hard if you're going to love someone. Never never never ration out your affections to people that are clearly worth it in your life. Some people do that. I know people that love me, but hold back from giving me their all and I can understand that, but we do not have any guarantee that I will always have you or that you will have me.

For my part, I'm making plans for a return trip, but I have much to ponder still about loving.

I suppose I will do as I have done and love hard even when it hurts, but the transience of us all cannot be overstated; our time left to love each other is completely unknown and I will always give my utmost and last to love you and let you know I do.

I hope you think enough of me to reach into the deepest parts of your love and give me the unbridled, unfiltered kind of love that (1) I crave and (2) I deserve to see if you think I'm worth loving at all.

If not, I'll give you this chance to back out. I'll let it be. I won't even bother you with it again.

On the other hand, if your love were a fire, I want you to burn white hot and if it consumes me, then let not even the ashes remain.